The phrase "Relax, don't do it" primarily refers to a directive to delay gratification, particularly in a sexual context, by controlling impulses and prolonging an experience.
This iconic line, famously from Frankie Goes to Hollywood's 1983 hit song "Relax," carries a specific and widely recognized meaning rooted in sexual intimacy. At its core, it encourages a person to hold back from reaching an orgasm immediately, instead focusing on slowing down and maintaining control.
Understanding the Nuance
The instruction to "relax" in this context is not about general calmness but about a deliberate act of slowing one's pace during sex. It's an encouragement to ease off or de-escalate the intensity momentarily. This allows for the delaying of the climax, preventing it from happening too soon.
Key Interpretations of the Phrase:
- Delaying Orgasm: The most direct interpretation is to resist the immediate urge to climax, thereby extending the duration of sexual activity and the pleasure derived from it. It's about maintaining control over one's body and sensations.
- Prolonging Pleasure: By holding back, the intention is to draw out the sexual experience, allowing for a more extended period of arousal and heightened anticipation. This can lead to a more intense and satisfying culmination when it eventually occurs.
- Mindful Engagement: The phrase can also imply a form of mindful engagement in the act, where one is acutely aware of their body's responses and consciously manages them for greater shared or individual enjoyment.
Deconstructing the Components
To further clarify, consider the individual parts of the phrase:
| Term | Implied Action | Desired Outcome |
|---|---|---|
| Relax | Slowing down, easing intensity, taking a breath | Gaining control, reducing immediate urgency |
| Don't Do It | Refraining from immediate climax, holding back | Prolonging pleasure, achieving deeper satisfaction |
Why Delay Gratification?
The concept of "relax, don't do it" aligns with practices aimed at enhancing sexual endurance and mutual pleasure.
- Increased Satisfaction: For many, delaying orgasm can lead to a more profound and powerful climax when it finally arrives, as well as enabling a longer, more connected experience with a partner.
- Enhanced Intimacy: By taking time and not rushing, partners can explore deeper levels of physical and emotional connection.
- Skill Development: For some, it's a technique to improve control over their sexual response, often referred to as "edging" or "orgasm control."
